Black. Gold.

I've been around..

So here I am, with nothing to say. I can express no emotion, because I no longer feel, nor do I care to. I love living each day with a clear head and an open mind, walking around in a level-headed tomb, but don't let it get the best of you, because I'm stronger than ever and still disgusted by your empathy of self-reflection and ignorance.

This is me, laughing at you, because you're weak.
Denial will get the best of you. Consume.

It's been some time..

So I haven't updated this in a few days, I've been quite caught up in life. A friend of mine recently passed away from a trauma related incident in which he fell 12ft, striking the back of his head on concrete; he had severe bleeding in his brain and his heart stopped a few days later. He was only 22yrs old. If you believe in prayer, than feel free to drop some on his 19yr old wife, newly turned 4yr old daughter, his 2 brothers and all the family/friends affected by the incident. RIP Alex Rosales.

Besides this recent tragedy, I've been pretty busy in school. I had midterms a week ago. I was scared I really screwed up on my test(s), but ends up I came out on top, yessssss. In other news, I've been in recomp mode for the last month and a half (working out), and now the time has come to start bodybuilding again. I haven't worked out at all this week, and on Monday I start back harder than ever. I am going to smash every plateau from my last 'season.' Other than that, everything has been same old same old. I still encounter people on the daily that remind me of how ignorant, close-minded, and straight up dumb people can be. Do people honestly even use their brains anymore? Free yourself already.

RIP All my fallen friends.

Recognize Player

"What is it like to choke on every word you said.
What is it like to shit on everything you had?
Lowest of the low.
I'll never fucking be like you.
Lowest of the low.
Now sink into your fucking hell.
What is it like to become what you once despised?
What is it like to pile lies on top of lies?
Lowest of the low.
So now you sink into your hell.
All the people you used, it's coming back at you.
All the promises broke, on them you fucking choke."

What me worry?

I could honestly careless (in most instances) what other people think of me; And don't think just because I'm a 'social butterfly' that I'm trying to impress anyone. I am what I am, one crazy kid with a heart that most neglect to see or understand. True, over the past few years my mouth has become a bit out of control, but I am aware of this, as well as some of my actions that have gone a bit over the line and am dealing with it accordingly (I don't know how many times I can say this). Life's a risk carnal, stay true. Accept yourself, recognize your own flaws, and accept others for theirs. When someone gives you advice, understand that it's because they care about you, not because they want to make you feel 'dumb,' 'inferior,' etc. Don't be ignorant, don't be fake.

BE YOURSELF.
Don't let others control who you are, everyone has their own, often times retarded, assumptions and interpretations of who you are, but only YOU know the REAL you. Stay Gold.

Where do I go now.

I hear the train a comin'

It's rolling round the bend
And I ain't seen the sunshine since I don't know when,
I'm stuck in Folsom prison, and time keeps draggin' on
But that train keeps a rollin' on down to San Antone..
When I was just a baby my mama told me. Son,
Always be a good boy, don't ever play with guns.
But I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die
When I hear that whistle blowing, I hang my head and cry..

I bet there's rich folks eating in a fancy dining car
They're probably drinkin' coffee and smoking big cigars.
Well I know I had it coming, I know I can't be free
But those people keep a movin'
And that's what tortures me...

Well if they freed me from this prison,
If that railroad train was mine
I bet I'd move it on a little farther down the line
Far from Folsom prison, that's where I want to stay
And I'd let that lonesome whistle blow my blues away.....




I've never felt so alone.

The human condition in twelve fractions..

A note to readers;
The purpose of this blog is meant solely for the release and expression of the thought process within my mind in searching for the explanation of events, feelings and activities which take place on this ever so changing journey we call life. Therefore, the thoughts and feelings expressed are meant to be read with an open mind, and are not posted as any sort of 'verbal' assault, cheap shot, or degradation to anyone; if you know me, than you know that I am not that type of person. Therefore, Many of the ideas brought fourth within this blog should not be taken lightly; don't just look at the surface of the idea, look deeper into what's being said, with a completely unbiased approach. Thus, assumptions will lead you astray. If you have been offended by anything I've said, re-read it from a different approach, nothing I have posted has been written in order to harm anyone. Look deeper into the context of what is being said; simply put, open your mind, leave everything else behind.